Well we leave for the East Coast a week from tomorrow.  The last 4 weeks have flown by almost in a blur but they have been so great, that the memories stay with me.  Jo and I have been scrambling to do all the things we have wanted to do in our time here but haven’t taken the time in the past.  We have been busy with working and packing and trying to fit it all in.  Where to start….

Pride: What a great weekend.  It started with the beer garden at the Rose on Friday.  We ran into friends, met the ones we were expecting to see, and we drank some alcohol.  Saturday was spent in the sunshine on the hill buying very gay things, eating food, playing in the water laying on the grass.  Then we participated in the Dyke march, but only up to the liquor store, where we took a detour to purchase some nips.  Then off to Hero’s for some dinner and more drinking.  I even remember how horrible my allergies were, and how they basically forced me to call it an early night…so no Cherry for me and Jo.  Sunday found us marching with the Breakers in the parade.  It was amazing.  More so than last year.  The weather was great and everyone was in great spirits.  After the parade off to Zeeks for some pizza and then off to the fountain.  Got to hang out with the Beefs and Tara and Nikole, and of course Jo.  There was much dancing in the fountain and laughing and hugging and taking in the sun.  It was so amazing to just see the sheer number of people, having fun, dancing, smiling, hugging, kissing and accepting each other.  I don’t think I saw one unhappy face that day.  And to top off the weekend, we went to a storm game, and they won.

Canoeing on Lake Washington: We rented a canoe from UW and heading out on the lake.  It was so cool and was my first canoe experience.  We saw lots of baby ducks and lots of big ducks and some geese.  The weather was great, the company better…good times.

4th of July: Right on the lake, right in front of the barge, with great people.  It was pretty amazing and there were a number of times where I thought nothing will ever beat this 4th for the best ever.  You have not lived until you have had fireworks explode right over your head….its….crazy cool/scary.

Olympic Peninsula: Camping up at Lake Crescent was good fun.  Smores and asshole, beers and laughing.  Being a mere 20 feet from a deer (maybe even closer)…baby ducks…ice cream cookies and fires.  Then we were off to the coast.  We camped at Mora beach.  Took a trip to the Hoh rainforest for a short hike and picnic lunch by the river.  Had a yummy dinner, played some Trivial Pursuit and then more games by the fire.   On the way home, Jo and I decided to drive down the coast and around.  So many beautiful beaches and fun rocks to climb.  I was glad we got to see it all together…oh yeah don’t forget Dairy Queen for a treat

BBQ at Tasha’s: Tasha has work people over to her house for a goodbye bbq of sorts.  Lets just say that 5 of us killed a bottle of grey goose and 3 bottles of wine.  We had good food and lots and lots of laughs.  It was so great to be able to spend time with Tasha and Ryan and my work friends before leaving.

Barney Time and Family Time: Saturday found me hung over after the BBQ.  Made my way home and met Barney to take things to the Goodwill and my dresser home to my mom.  We made it to my Mom’s house, dropped off the dresser, set up the dvd player and stereo for mom, and then headed off to Barney’s house.  We got to her house, put the roof racks on, loaded up the kayaks and then we were off to the public boat launch in Gig Harbor.  It was my first time kayaking and it was sooo much fun.  I felt so safe with Barney there and it was so nice to just float and talk and spend that quality time together.  We finally turned back, got some drink fixins and some snacks, made an amazing dinner, went through pictures and watched a movie.  I’m so glad that I was able to spend a whole day with Barney.  I’m really going to miss having her near me (not to say I won’t miss my other friends too because I will…Barney and I have just spent a lot of time together over the last couple years).

Sunday I spent with my mom, sister and brother painting the laundry room.  Then Mom, Rayna and I went to see Mamma Mia.  It was funny and def worth seeing.  And then my mom drove me back to Seattle and we got to talk and spent time together just the two of us.  I said goodbye to my brother and I worry that I will never see him again.  I hope that’s not the case.  I can’t remember if I told him that I love him.  I hope I did.

And now I’m in my last week of work before my 3 week vacation.  Trying to get everything tied up, packed up, loaded up.  Actually Jo is doing most of the work which makes me feel bad.  I want to help but I can’t take this week off.  I’m excited for this adventure to begin….but now its time for me to head out to the ballpark for the Mariners vs Red Sox game.  Go Sox!

Well we only have 22 days left in Seattle.  The past few weeks have been wonderful.  I have had the opportunity to hang out with a number of friends.  I had an amazing Pride weekend.  And my fourth of July was pretty freaking amazing too (right on the water, almost close enough to touch, where the fireworks looked as though they would fall on our heads).  Next weekend is a BBQ at my co-worker’s place and then off to the Olympic Peninsula for some camping in the rain forest and hopefully a day on the beach (with some skimboarding maybe).  The next weekend it might be a trip to the casino in Olympia and then maybe a little hiking at Rainer or St. Helens.  Then its our going away party and then we are off.

With all that on the weekends, the only time to pack with be during the weeks after work.  It is making things more stressful.  I would be lost without Jo.  She is my rock.  But we will get it done.  And today we been able to get much done.  Now I’m just taking a little Jess time while Jo gets some friends time before we leave.  Maybe I should just get a little more packing done or I could watch an episode of Weeds….what to do, what to do.

How fast do you have to fall, or is it how hard, or is it both?  These were the thoughts going through my mind on the bus the other day.  A woman got on the bus, and the whole time she sat there talking to herself and what I’m sure were the voices in her head.  A whole two sided conversation.  And she was getting kind of surly when she got off the bus.  Seeing her made me think of homeless people because I feel I see a lot of homeless people talking to themselves.  And it made me wonder is the talking a symptom of being homeless and losing everything?  Or did they come that way (for lack of better wording).  And then I thought, when someone becomes homeless, do they fall fast, hard or both?  Does it happen gradually or all at once.  Is it because of a tragedy or because of a lack of something?  It could happen to me I think.  It could happen because none of us really know what could happen when it really comes down to it.  I’m sure many of homeless people out there didn’t think that would ever happen to them.  Maybe that’s the danger.  If you think something could never happen to you, do you stop becoming vigilant in your life?  Is that the gradual fall?  You let things get out of hand, you stop concentrating, you stop caring until next thing you know, you have nothing but the clothes on your back and the clothes in your bag.  I don’t know that this particular blog has anything to do with anything.  I guess I just don’t want to forget that it could happen to me.  One day, due to events I cannot foresee, I could be asking you for spare change.  Maybe because I recognize that, I won’t let it happen.  I guess only time will tell.

If you know me, you know how much I love dogs. I’ve been home this afternoon and had the show “The Dog Whisperer” on while I worked. Now I’m just watching the show and they have a story about a dog that the person loved and had to put down. And the way she described it made me feel so sad about my dog Cassie. I remember when we put her down and to this day it breaks my heart. She was such a sweet dog. A great companion and friend. She was always would greet me at the door, sit and wait to be petted like a good girl. I remember how she would come into my room at home. First she would bang her head against the door to loosen it, then she would nudge it open with her head. Then she would stick her head in the room and wait to be invited in. Of course I would always say yes. She would nudge the door all the way open and come in the room. Then she would sit at the foot of the bed and stare at me. Most of the time I would invite her up onto the bed, but sometimes I would say something like “not today.” If that was the case, she would just lay down and go to sleep. I know that no other dog will come close to her, but that doesn’t mean I can’t dream.

I want a dog now. I’ve wanted a dog for years. A black lab, has always been my dream dog. Maybe it is because one of our dogs, Dax, was a black lab mix. We were best friends and I took him to obedience training because he was possessive of food (and of course to just have some basic manners). Well he snapped at my sister and got her on the hand so he had to go. Cassie was a golden and I love those dogs but there is something about a black lab. I know that I have to be in the right place in my life to have a dog, and I know that time is not now. But I hope some day in the near future I will get the little dog I’ve been waiting for. I;ve waited for 12 years so far, I can wait a little more.  Until that time, I can always dream…..and I do.

Heading to Santa Cruz tonight to visit my Dad.  Should be a good time.  It’s going to be hot down there too, but I’ll be nice and close to the ocean so I can go cool off   Excited to see Dad.  Its been a couple months.  Tomorrow he has to work so Rayna and I will probably hang out at the beach (poor us).  I’m hoping to get a kind of nice skimboard that I can keep at my parent’s house so I’ll always have one there when I go visit.  There are supposed to be some pretty great beaches for skimming so I’m excited.  I plan on coming back sore and ready for summer.  Hopefully I’ll have some pictures to show/share and maybe even a video of me falling on my face (or not).

Ok I didn’t actually run far away, but I ran further than I have in years yesterday.  I went to the gym after work hoping I could run for at least 20 minutes straight.  Two weeks ago, I seemed to hit a wall where running 20 minutes became really hard.  It was frustrating because the week before I could run 20 minutes no problem.  Last week, I rode my bike to work 4 of 5 days of the week.  Having not been on my bike since my 100 mile ride in September, I struggled a bit that week with riding to and from work.  Hills were hard again, but unlike this time last year, I was able to make it home only resting at stop lights (and not partway up hills).  I considered this a victory.

So yesterday I headed to the gym not expecting much out of myself, but expecting that I at least push myself to 20 minutes of running non stop.  I started off and felt pretty good, but expected that I would start feeling my legs protest as they usually do about 5 minutes in.  Well, 5 minutes came and went and my legs felt great.  15 minutes came and went and I’m still feeling good.  My heart rate used to jump up right about here as I would start to get tired.  But yesterday it was still pretty low for me.  Then I hit the 20 minute mark and I still felt great.  I decided to keep going for 5 more minutes.  25 minutes…still feeling good.  Awesome, I’m going to push it to 30 and then stop.  30 minutes…still feeling good, but my heart rate is starting to go up.  I’ll just go to 35.  35…now i’m starting to get tired, but why not just see if I can reach 40.  37…tired.  38…really tired.  39….starting to stumble…just one more minute…just 60 more seconds.  40!  I actually ran for 40 minutes.  I was tired at the end for sure but I made it.  I ran just under 3.5 miles.  I don’t remember just running 3.5 miles since maybe my year at Smith…so 1998.  Crazy.

So today, I’m going to shoot for 20 minutes again and see how I feel.  If I can push it out to 30 I’d be psyched.  If I could do 40 again..I’d be surprised.  What’s more important to me than anything is just getting my self to the gym and trying.  I will be happy with 20 minutes just because it means I’m doing something.

I went down to Tacoma again yesterday to help Mom with the packing. I was happy to see that Grandma’s room was finally cleared out for the most part and ready for the walls to be painted etc. Funny enough, we spent the first 30-45 minutes looking pictures of the various family crests that make up our genealogy. I’ll blog more on that later. Then it was up to my Mom’s room to help her sort through stuff.

I was there until about 12:00am since I had to pick Jo up from the airport. As I was leaving I turned off all the lights, grabbed the things I needed and headed out to Jo’s car. I looked back at the house I’ve lived in since I started high school. Everything was dark but the light on the porch. And it hit me that I won’t have this house to come back to soon. Enter my “holy crap” moment. Holy Crap I won’t have this house anymore. I won’t be able to drive an hour to see my mom and dad, sister and brother. Driving to the grocery store I noticed how much stuff has changed. And memories of “candy walks” with my family to the little Mom and Pop store that is gone, the yarn store where I would go get string for friendship bracelets, bike rides through the campus with Dad, Karl and Rayna, they all come flooding back. And I panic.

While I’m excited for change and moving to Boston, sometimes it seems like too much is changing. I’m moving to Boston, my Mom and Dad are selling the house and moving to Santa Cruz, my sister is thinking of going to Israel for a few month and possibly finishing out school there. I think sometimes that I can’t handle all of this change. I’m going to miss my family. I’m going to miss my friends. I’m going to miss at least two years of the twin’s life and I’m starting to feel like there is not enough time to do all I want to do before I go. Not enough time to spend with friends, with family. And I realize, while I’m excited to do this, I’m scared out of my mind sometimes. And I know that I’ll visit. I know that those friendships that are really special, really strong, are the one’s I’ll never lose. And I have Jo to share the adventure with. So I know that it will all work out and there will come the time when I look back and laugh at how scared I once was.

But for now….Holy CRAP!

I’m hoping my t-mobile contact (hopefully you know who you are…m) can confirm this…rumor. I talked with someone from T-Mobile again asking if I could order an iphone through them or if I had to all T-Mobile Germany…and if they would actually be able to ship it to me. But I also just wanted to know if I could upgrade my phone anytime soon because I basically HATE my Razr. She said that if I wanted an option to the iphone I should wait until holiday season when T-Mobile will have the BlackBerry Touch and I will be eligible for an upgrade.

Right after the call I went online to get more info on the Touch only to find that there is nothing concrete about it. No one really knows release dates or what carriers (and one of the site with the most info was expecting this phone to drop Q1 or Q2 of this year (we are still in Q2 of this year and no specific news makes me think not)). Now, I’m just hoping that she knows something they don’t because she works for T-Mobile and not because she is trying to keep me away from the iphone (ie Cingular). I mean really she has no need to worry. I don’t want to switch carriers. I’m really happy with T-Mobile and have been with them for at least 3 years now. But if she is right, this Touch will be pretty sweet with, 3G, EDGE, wifi, and possibly a slider QWERTY keyboard to compliment the touch screen interface. So if you are reading this oh T-Mobile insider, please let me know if I should get my hopes up or not. Until then, I’m going to see if there is such a thing as a cheap phone out there that’s not a freaking Razr.

BlackBerry Touch Article

Ok, maybe this isn’t really a new weightloss plan….i mean the basic idea of it has been around for a long time. Anyone that knows me knows that about 6 weeks ago I weighed more than I ever have in my whole life. I look back to college when I thought I was big and long for the days of 140-145. 6 weeks ago I weighed 181 pounds. No Joke!! And I’m not ashamed to let people know that because I know I’m changing my ways. My plan consists of eating better and working out. So that’s not new. That’s always been my plan…and the plan of many many other people. My problem has always been getting myself to the gym consistently. I can usually get about a week in and then I don’t go again for months. So Jo helped me figure out a way to get me to the gym on a regular basis.

A star chart. That’s right. Remember back in 1st grade when you would have a star chart to…well chart your progress in something? And when you filled the chart you would get a prize. Well that’s what I’m doing. I have a star chart. Sounds silly I know. But so far I have gone to the gym at least 2 times a week (but I would say I’m going more like 3-4 times a week). I get a star for just showing up and putting my gym clothes on. I get a star if I do abs. I get two stars if I lift weights. And I get 3 stars if I do cardio for 20 mins. When I fill up my chart I get to eat pizza. If I cheat and eat lots of sugar or bad food, I get stars taken away (or a day working out doesn’t count).

As I progress, there will be more stars to fill and longer goals (ie…cardio for 30 mins, cardio for 40 mins etc), and different prizes. I think my next chart might be something like ice cream or Mexican food or something like that. The main goal of the chart was to get me going to the gym for longer than just a week and its worked. The other main goal was keep me motivated…working toward a goal I can see, grab, feel (cuz I don’t know about you but I want to be rewarded right away and weight loss just doesn’t work like that).

The way things are going, I get pizza on Saturday (if I do cardio, and abs tomorrow that is) and I jumped on the scale today and I’m at 172. Next week I start lifting 3 days a week and cardio every day I go to the gym. I will have more stars to fill out but I’m looking forward to working toward my next reward.

So, if you are like me and have trouble getting yourself to the gym, re-visit childhood and try out the star chart. You might be surprised at how much fun it actually is and how it is a visual reminder of what you want and how to get it.

Hey Friends,

Are you on T-Mobile and you want an iphone but you don’t want to go buy one and hack it only to find that Apple updates firmware and BAM your $300-400 phone is bricked?  I have good news for you!  T-Mobile Germany is the official retailer for the iphone in Germany.  I called T-Mobile and asked, if I purchased an iphone from T-Mobile Germany if I could plug in my sim here and it would work.  The answer is YES.  Even better news, if you don’t mind having the current EDGE phone, they are dropping the price in Germany to about $155 American (99 Euros).  But I’m going to wait for the 3g iphone to be released and get that one.  T-Mobile should have complete 3g support by the end of this year.  And since the 3g iphone looks like it will be released some time in June, I have time to save up.

Also, take a look at T-Mobile Germany’s phones (using google’s language translator) www.t-mobile.de.  They have a ton of really awesome phones that you can’t get here in the US but will work fine here.  Good news if you give a damn about cell phones.  Anyhoo, I thought I would share.